Once upon a time, a group of travelers entered a strange new land looking for lost parents… and adventure! This new city was named Clifton. It sat atop a large plateau surrounded by smaller farming lands. The travelers entered the great city and immediately saw a busy town filled with all manner of creatures and shops. At the center of it all was a large building shaped not unlike an upside-down top.
Days prior, the Bard had received a message from his friend and bard-of-lesser-ability, Till, to meet at a top-shaped building for a gift and clues to the whereabouts of the lost parents. This must be the place!
“But what if we need a password?” asked the doubting and smelly warlock.
“It was days ago you received that message. Are we sure you heard right?” asked the boss, drool falling out the sides of his mouth.
But the Bard had dealt with naysayers in the past and he would show them that the Bard was welcome at any establishment. He proceeded to the top-shaped building with the samurai, the druid, and the archer, whereas those who did not have faith went further into town to visit a long-time companion of the boss.
At the Tippy-Top, the Bard smoothly gained him and his friends entrance to the bar. As they entered the main floor they saw an amazing sight! The outside had been impressive enough, but inside they saw just how massive a structure it really was. The bottom floor was alive with unbelievably luxurious guests in friendly cocktail conversation. A grand bar served lavished drinks at the far end near an empty stage, but the height of the building was what really caught the eyes of the adventurers. It was a series of concentric rings that seemed to stretch up forever with balconies at every floor that allowed the rich and famous to look down on the levels below. This was the Bard’s kind of place!
They approached the bartender, and the Bard asked if any care package had been left for them. Indeed there was! A sack of coins, a mystic bow, and a large shield. The archer took the bow and said, “I’ll take this before you can sell it for drinking money,” while glaring at the Bard who was currently wondering if he could sell the bow for drinking money.
“Should we ask about the owner of this place?” asked the druid, but the Bard didn’t hear her. He was busy looking at the rich and powerful people around him and then at the empty stage nearby. Grabbing his trusty Lute, he approached the stage. Yes, this was his kind of place…
Meanwhile, Team Garbage did indeed reunite with the boss’s old friend, Xan McGregor. At her home, they learned many things about the town, but one thing above all else caught the boss’s attention. An art gallery was coming to town, a gallery that had tremendous works of art (including the very rare “Eye of the Beholder”), a gallery whose owners did not appreciate its contents…
Always altruistic, the boss would be happy to relieve these fat cats of the burden of unappreciated art. But before plans could come to fruition, Xan received a message: “You gotta come down to the Tippy-Top! An unreasonably handsome halfling man is tearing up the stage!”
Xan, the boss, the monk, and the warlock entered the Tippy-Top to find an incredible sight. The atmosphere was electric, the very windows were shaking in their frames, and there–hovering in the air 15 feet above the stage–was the Bard playing his Lute like he had never done before! Clearly this was someone whom they had underestimated. As he descended, the crowd of nobles roared with applause! Tears were shed, religions were renounced, and coin and undergarments were tossed on stage. They would have to apologize to the Bard later, but for now they followed their escort to the upper ring.
“There’s someone here I’d like you to meet,” said Xan. “Though he can be a little rough around the edges, he’s actually a town noble. Tortles and gentlemen, may I introduce you to Lord Carn!”
“Bah,” said a stout dwarf that approached them from the crowd, “I ain’t a ‘Lord’ like the rest of these schmucks. You can call me Kendar.”
Xan rolled her eyes, but smiled. “Kendar, these are my friends from far away. Their adventures have led them to our city. They’d like to see more of it, and maybe the upcoming art tour.”
“Haha! Finally!” exclaimed the dwarf. “It’s about time you brought me some real men. Not like these prissy nobles that always prance around here. Tell me boy, have you been in many scraps?”
The boss stammered for a moment. “Ah… well, there was this one beastie that…”
“Ah, I knew it! I knew yous was a fighter from the moment I saw yous. Say, see if you can handle one of my moves!”
The Bard was enjoying rubbing elbows with the prissy nobles and was even welcomed by the owner of the establishment when he saw his friend the boss plummet to the ground floor from the fourth story balcony. “I’m coming Boss!” screamed the monk as he too jumped from the balcony.
The crowd was silent as the duo brushed themselves off and rose to their feet. Seeing their friend the Bard, they approached him to commend him on his performance. “Er… thanks,” said the Bard, still noticing the crowd noticing them, “but maybe we should take our leave and discuss our next move.”
“Nonsense!” said the boss. “Besides, I didn’t see the beginning of the show. Come on you fancypants nobles, who wants an encore!” Those not offended by the boss’s word choice showed mild interest, but the Bard still wasn’t so sure.
“Oh, come on. It’ll be even better than before! We just need some… pyrotechnics!” On his signal, the warlock cast a spell that send jets of fire into the air. A lot of fire. Too much fire. The kind that singed the first row of bystanders.
Seeing things going downhill fast, the druid, thinking quickly, began a polymorph spell that would immobilize the overzealous boss. “Perhaps,” she thought, “if he’s going to be a huge ass, he should be a huge donkey!” Unfortunately this spell was complicated and she had never cast it before. She fumbled a consonant, and instead of a huge Donkey he became a huge Monkey!
The crowd that had not already left to heal their burns began to scream and run for the exit. The rampaging ape / boss tried his best to salvage the situation, but his efforts just resulted in more damage.
By the time the fires died down and the spell wore off, the adventurers found themselves alone in a ruined bar.
“Well,” whispered the boss, “at least they won’t forget us.”
“I hate you,” answered the Bard.