Once upon a time, a group of adventurers found themselves between a rock and a soon-to-be-murdered place: a warlock, a monk, a boss, a druid, an archer, and, of course, The Bard.
While brave and kind at heart, these adventurers had a way of being… misunderstood. They inspired this impulse in others so regularly that their very lives soon hung in the balance! Fortunately, ever the diplomat, Milo volunteered to clear their names and approached the governor of the town to end this animosity.
Negotiations lasted long into the night. The governor was a shrewd individual but not even he could outwit the clever Milo! In the end, all charges were dropped… in exchange for the small matter of attending the governor’s birthday party. And also providing entertainment. In the form of an arena battle. Against a terrifying monster. To the death.
But this was no matter for the daring adventurers!
Milo quickly returned to his companions, his small arms straining against the weight of recovered confiscated equipment. Normally his faithful companion, the druid, would handle the heavy lifting, but without her, poor Milo was left with the burden of carrying their things like a common mule. Realizing others would be proud to carry the great Milo’s possessions, he turned to the nearest patron of the inn, a paladin named William, and quickly honored him with the task, ordering him to carry them to their room.
Upon reaching the room housing his companions, Milo informed them of the events, and they all praised him for his quick negotiation skills. What’s more, the new bellhop / paladin actually had firsthand experience with the terrible beast and, eager to avenge his comrades who had earlier lost their lives to it, agreed to fight with the group. What luck!
Still, such a challenge should not be undertaken lightly. So with a quick kick of the turtle-shaped ottoman and an accompanying groan, the group members decided to prepare for the birthday fight, each in their own way.
The paladin, the monk, and the warlock went to train at the local body-building temple. There they spent hours getting pounded by robed men. They left feeling sore, but satisfied.
The paladin and druid, relying on her incredible book smarts, sought out the local literature on horrible beasts for any secrets for defeating their adversary. The owner of the book in question was unfazed by the druid’s feminine wiles but was willing to trade it for some alone time with the paladin, but the paladin, still exhausted from his escapades with the sweaty men, could only find the energy to buy it for 50 gold. On their return, the book told of a common monster in these lands, more metal than flesh, called a bulette, that had the strength of 7 men! This would truly be an appropriate challenge for someone of Milo’s caliber!
The boss went to gain more information. After visiting the governor to seek out mystic treachery (there was none; he was a normal-variety bastard), he sought out the mysterious beast. Stealthily he crept into the arena’s holding pens and there, as big as a mountain, stood the creature. This… this would be more challenging than previously thought.
“No worries!”, exclaimed the archer. “I have investigated the secrets of this town and uncovered a network of sewers beneath the city. All manner of monstrosities are likely to be living there. Why, it wouldn’t take long at all to reach the next level of our full potential by fighting them!”.
So off they went, into the depths of the stinking sewers. The archer was right, for in a series of fights worthy of any montage, the adventurers overcame the terrible sewer slimes and emerged stronger than ever (and also a little more acidy than ever).
But would this newfound strength allow them to live long enough to join Milo in victory? Would the governor truly forgive their prior transgressions? Time would certainly tell as their destinies rushed towards them!