This was a tough session to run, because for the first time I could palpably tell that some party members were not enjoying the game. However, it was also for me one of the most enjoyable sessions to run, and indicative of the type of game I strive to create. In some ways, my style of DMing reflects my own personal spiritual beliefs. Here’s how: I believe in a God that grants us freewill to make any choices we choose, but regardless of the wisdom or morality of those decisions, God will use those choices for a greater good. That greater good may be a long time in coming, and it also doesn’t preclude us from suffering the negative consequences of our decisions. Oftentimes those decisions also affect a lot more than ourselves. This is obviously a much larger discussion, and no one plays D&D to discuss theology. I say this merely to give context to my DM philosophy.
As a player, you are always free to choose your course of action. There may be wonderful things that happen as a result. There may be dire, or even fatal consequences to those actions. My job is to create the world and impartially adjudicate how it responds to your actions. This includes the creatures and characters in it, many of whom have malevolent intentions. And everyone has their own desires and motivations.
Whatever you choose, I am always attempting to work those decisions to the party’s advantage. I think sometimes it can seem like the DM is out to get you. I can assure you that is never the case. I’m generally trying to figure out how to keep everyone alive, not kill them. I do not create creatures or encounters for the purpose of killing off party members. Rest assured, if you encounter something, you can handle it. “Handling it” may not mean fighting it. But you’ll always have options. Usually you’ll have options I haven’t even thought of, which is the most fun for me.
A huge part of the enjoyment for me is creating these stories, then watching all of you take them in directions I never envisioned. This sometimes works to your benefit, sometimes not. This past session was a steamroller of the “sometimes not” variety. From the moment Kerath entered Shagol’s chambers, decisions seemed to be headed down a dark path. His departure after a few minutes via the Feywild gem did not please Shagol. When she reemerged into the chamber, she was surprised to still see the party, who had become distracted looking for treasure on the altar and hadn’t left the premises yet. This was an unfortunate collision of bad timing and a pissed off Shagol. Orc’s worship power, and Shagol has ruled for so long because of her ability to wield tremendous power. She has also become bored, and in a rare state of enlightenment for an orc, she has found that she delights in using her power in new and inventive ways. It’s more fun than just killing things outright. She’s incredibly arrogant, which is justified to a point as she hasn’t yet been put in her place. Her Mass Suggestion was a means of amusement – more fun than battling you herself. She knew (in her own mind at least) she could kill you. She wanted to see if you could kill each other.
Then you all failed your saving throws. Well, except for the bewildered and childlike dwarf that cannot communicate. Or heal. Or even think to do anything except rage at nearby attackers, even if they were friends just a minute ago. I was starting to get worried.
Then Qeew creates her spirit guardians, and Shagol is caught in the crossfire. Shagol is not so much hurt, but annoyed. And she was going to do what I thought was most Shagol-like – lash out at the stupid bird that struck her. However, Christine argued vehemently that the damage was not that much, and Shagol wouldn’t do that. As a DM, I am often torn between doing what I think the NPC would do, listening and applying logic and/or pleading from a PC, and the greater good of the party. In this case, I knew that if Qeew was struck, Suggestion would end for her. As a cleric, she could begin to heal the rest of the party as they battled each other. Qeew and Blumf could turn their attention to Shagol, which may have caused her to drop the Mass Suggestion entirely.
Qeew was pissed, and seemed intent on winning the Battle Royale. Christine did not think it fair that Shagol would strike at Qeew given the infinitesimal damage Shagol had taken. This was a case where I made a decision based on player input, not on what I thought an NPC would actually do. It was also a case where a player was arguing against something that would actually benefit them in the big picture, but only I knew that. This becomes a tough choice – am I acting impartially, or am I trying to steer the outcome too much in the party’s favor? I considered this, and decided to let things play out a few more rounds as they were.
Eventually, Shagol did strike out, because she could not mate with a “stupid girl”!
As we know, there were some unfortunate rolls. Bad death saves for one. I thought it was a stroke of brilliance that Argora would attempt to heal touch Charlie on the way back to Shagol’s boudoir. Unfortunately, this was another bad dice roll. And so Charlie didn’t make it out alive.
The fun and challenge of being a DM is knowing the big picture. I know the character’s backstories, and use them as much as possible when creating this make-believe world. I know what happens when Kerath and Shagol meet in the dark, or when Argora and Shagol do the same. I get to develop the story around that. Just know that I do so with the intention of making it a fun and enjoyable experience, and a big part of that experience is letting your character’s make the decisions that dictate their own fate.


Joe, I love the way you’re approaching DMing. Although I was sidelined most of the session, this was perhaps my very favorite. My perspective was very different from the others’, so I can’t speak for them, but I wouldn’t change a thing–I just wish Steven had been there.
I love it Joe! Even though I wasn’t there last week, with all the detail that has been described I really feel like I was, and I can jump into things tonight no questions asked!
I think it’s extremely important to remember that this is a game and we’re all having fun. Nothing is personal, and the DM is never out to kill us all. Sure it may feel that way at times, but D&D life is never easy! If it was, we would be killing wild boars in the woods every session. Facing life or death situations, making world-altering decisions and going against our gut feelings is the fun of it! And if a bad decision of made and a character dies because of it, then that is what happens and we role with it!
Last week Charlie died, and I think it is absolutely fitting to the story. We just had this big conversation on what to do if one of us falls in this journey, and just right after one of us actually fell. Who knows what will happen tonight; will Charlie be making a return to the living or will I be rolling a new character? That’s the fun of D&D. And even if Charlie’s quest for vengeance ends premature and the vile A’Darling family continues to rule in unjust power and never pays for their crimes, that is the will of the gods. This isn’t a Lifetime movie, we don’t always have happy endings.